First and foremost, I can’t believe I wrote this when I was 18. But I believe I wrote this back in college. And I’m sharing it because it’s so strong and speaks so much truth despite the title so I hope whoever gets to read this will identify with it and learn from my ignorance.
Here it goes.
I delighted myself with nonsense lies
Found the truth in your actions
Didn’t think defenses were vital
Trapped in a circle of confusion
Saw the best and worst of alibis
Wrapped answers in your sweet lies
Too late to run away and ignore
There’s too much more
There’s so much more
I know I didn’t sign up for this
Signs of inconsistent affection
Far too trusting, why bother asking
The truth made it all seem a lie
Silent regrets don’t change a thing
Stop knocking on a locked door
Failed to see the all too obvious
There’s so much more
There’s too much more
nothing’s ever late or early.
It is when it’s supposed to be.
I mean, come on, guys. Do you think we enjoy listening to stories about your ex?
Yes we’re not dating. Yes we’re not a couple. But still, I don’t wanna hear you say “She was really pretty then”
I dunno. just keep it to yourself because saying it out loud is annoying as annoying orange.
MAYBE I WILL.
Every day since that morning we started talking to each other…
Since that day… at 5:00 in the morning… when you started to introduce your world to me… was never like any other morning I had before.
Finally, after a long time… I’ve found something constant happening in my life… and its talking to you every day.
and i think that’s why I am so afraid when I realize that I do like you.
and when that time came, that I found myself drifting away from you, I was surprised… because unlike how I usually push myself away from people, I decided not to go away.
If one day I get hurt from whatever it is that we have…
whatever it is that keeps us connected despite the land and seas that physically separates us..
There’s no one to blame but me.
I choose to stay.
I chose to keep our connection.
Because for the first time, in a looooong time, I found someone who makes me want to wake up and look forward to hours of talking and being thankful that I’m alive.
You’ve made me become thankful that I am alive.
I am a nursing graduate. I am a registered nurse. I have both hospital experience and home care experience.
But I work as an Editorial Assistant for one of the noted and peer reviewed medical journals in the Philippines.
Why did I get hired? Purely on recommendations and confidence that I can really do editorial work without formal and actual experience.
When it comes to research, journal work and basically publishing work, my only experience is that of a writer. I write. And I write from the heart. Not medical journal stuff writing, but feature writing. I can’t even brag about my news writing skills because I totally lack all the skills.
But I love to write. There is nothing else in the world that makes me heart flutter than that of the thought that I could actually write stories and inspire other people.
But recently, I realized I do lack formal writing skills and I only base my work on experience and gift/talent. Which I clearly should change.
I made a lot of mistakes in copy reading one paper and publishing a really miserable version of the article last December. I don’t wanna blame other people and I just really want to admit that it was me who overlooked the typographical errors and spacing and all editorial work, but my boss didn’t even press on me. She even said that the mistake was on the authors’ part and not ours. She is one amazing boss. She never gets angry at me and she believes in what I can do for the journal and trusts me completely.
WOW. I am blessed beyond measure. I was placed here, instead of a hospital or any work close to Nursing for that matter, for a reason and I won’t stop til I get there. To that place where I would really be happy in.
I’m so thankful. :)
Its funny. Because as far as I can remember, I was always there for everyone who needed me. But wow, I honestly couldn’t think of someone who could be with me whenever I needed someone. It doesn’t really have to be someone specific but its ironic how there seems to be no one available whenever I need someone.
They don’t even need to listen to my problems. They just have to be there.
I felt friendless today.. If you’re my friend and you’re reading this, maybe its time you reach out to me even if you don’t need anything. Cause the truth is, you only reach out to me whenever you need something.
Don’t even try to tell me that you think I’m someone who doesn’t need someone. Because we all know that I do. All of us do.1 note
Sometimes you just wake up at night feeling so empty.
You have a bunch of friends but at times when you need them the most, they’re out there somewhere not really thinking about you.
And then when you finally sit up from bed because sleep doesn’t really come, you find yourself asking God stuff that you usually ignore such as the loneliness you feel every now and then, why people seem to find love instantly, where is this life taking you…
and then you start crying hard… you try to diminish the weird sounds you create because crying doesn’t even lessen the hurt you feel..
and then after some minutes, you beg for sleep to come because that’s the only time when you can’t get hurt by reality…